Thursday, August 29, 2013

And This Week's Winner Is......

So, who should be named this time as Dr. Ken's Spankable Bottom Of The Week?

Taylor Swift?



A poolside tanning Selena Gomez?



No, after her performance at the VMAs, the award this week pretty much has to go to Miley Cyrus.



Her parents must be so proud.....

(Actually, her parents are probably consulting their GPS using the phrase, "Nearest woodshed"......)


Saturday, August 24, 2013

Radio Spanko

One of the recurring features of this blog--if it can be said to actually have any recurring features--is a little something I call "Radio Spanko"--comments relating to spanking that I happen to hear on the radio.  The remarks almost exclusively come from a station in the Minneapolis/ St. Paul area of Minnesota called MyTalk 107.1 FM, and the vast majority of the time the source is "The Lori and Julia Show" which is on from 3 p.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Friday.  I have, from the very first, suspected that Lori might be a bit of a spanko--if anyone on the show is going to mention "spanking", it's her--but, of course, I have no way of confirming that suspicion.  Julia might enjoy a little bit of spanking every now and then, too, but certainly not to the same extent as Lori--again, that's pure speculation on my part.

I haven't mentioned "Radio Spanko" for some time, mostly because I haven't caught any references to it on the station.  That doesn't mean they haven't been there, it just means that I don't hear every single minute of every program.  "Radio Spanko" finally flared up (only a teeny-tiny bit) on Friday during their second day of broadcasting from the Minnesota State Fair.  (I'm relying on my memory, here, so any quotes are most definitely not 100% accurate.)

The subject was casting for the Fifty Shades of Grey movie.  One of the latest to be mentioned for the male lead role was actor Charlie Hunnam from Sons Of Anarchy (and other things).  As their show was winding down for the day, Julia announced that there was a new name being mention for the lead role--Charlie Hunnam was no longer being rumored, and some new name was being bandied about in his place.

Lori sounded positively distraught upon hearing the news, telling Julia to not go ripping Charlie Hunnam away from the role.  Julia said she couldn't help it, it was just "breaking news" (although I can't honestly recall her ever mentioning the new name rumored for the role).

Lori protested, finally proclaiming, "Okay, I'll just say it.  He would be such a good spanker!"

Julia replied, "What you mean is you want him to spank you."

Let's just say that Lori didn't exactly rush to deny it..... :-)

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Spankee Tip # 1

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Monday, August 19, 2013

Call It A Hunch

I think she likes it.....well, so far, anyway......


Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Deal With It

Have you ever wanted to spank Heidi Klum?  Or, at the very least, see her get a smack on the butt?

I'm pretty sure Heidi Klum has made my Top Ten list of celebrity females that I'd love to spank at least once, if not more.  Alas, it probably is never going to happen, and I really can't help you make it a reality, either.  But as far as seeing her get her a smack on the bottom--I can point you in the right direction for that.

There's a fairly new TV show called Deal With It.  It's a hidden camera/prank/game show.  The "contestants" are usually a couple in a public place which is controlled by the show--everyone in the building is in one the gag.One member of the couple is discreetly and privately pulled aside and asked to participate on the show for a chance to win $5,000.  If they agree, they're fitted with an earpiece, and all they have to do to win money is do whatever the voice in their ear tells them to do.  For each instruction or challenge that they successful pull off, they're awarded a certain amount of money.  They might be told to say or do certain things.  They might have to accomplish something within a time limit.  The show usually brings in a celebrity guest to be on the microphone behind the scenes giving the player his or her instructions.  The other member of the couple, of course, has no clue as to what is going on while their friend's behavior becomes increasingly odd or bizarre or rude and obnoxious.  That's not a great explanation of the show--you'd probably need to watch an episode to get a better understanding of it.  I'm sure they explain it better than I do.

There are normally two segments per half-hour show, and each segment features a different guest celebrity.  In the 5th episode of the season, the second guest star on the show was Heidi Klum (her segment starts at about the 20-minute mark of the show).  A man was picked out and asked to wear the earpiece, and he agreed.  He was there with a female friend.  They began with some simple challenges--Heidi asked him to start talking with a German accent, for example.  The man's female companion looked like a very no-nonsense type, and she grew increasingly bewildered at her friend's behavior as this went on.

Then, Heidi instructed him that, in a few minutes, she was going to enter and walk across the lobby, and the man should come over and smack her on the ass.  (Someone later commented, "He should be paying us!")

Behind the scenes, Heidi called over Howie Mandel, who is a producer on the show, and asked him to take her place on the microphone to continue giving the man instructions.  She explained that she was going to go into the lobby and the man was to slap her on the butt.  Howie joked, "And what's the challenge?"

(Oh, really, Howie?  Does Heidi often ask men to smack her on the bottom?  Please, do go on and tell us more....)

Heidi walks across the lobby, as planned.  The man tells his female friend, "That's Heidi Klum!  She's so hot.  I'm going to slap her on the ass."  He starts to get up, and his friend is practically hanging onto his arm trying to restrain him.  He gets away, though, walks up behind Heidi, and gives her a very nice smack on her backside.  I must say, the camera captures it perfectly.

So, does the man eventually win $5,000?  Sadly, no.  Heidi reacts to the bottom-smack by slapping his face (fingertips only, so it's not a hard slap).  He sits back down and is instructed to call Heidi over, but then is supposed to get his friend to tell Heidi, "I'm sorry" within a certain amount of time.  Since his friend has done nothing wrong, she naturally--and stubbornly--refuses, and the time limit runs out on him.  Once it's all over, of course, they let the female friend in on what has been going on.

All in all, it's a very nice one-whacker to a very nice derriere.  I haven't seen a clip of it online yet, but I suspect it's only a matter of time.

Until then, I think the only fair thing to do is to name Heidi Klum as Dr. Ken's Spankable Bottom Of The Week.  Here's a few photos to support that claim--







Monday, August 5, 2013

You Can't Judge a Book.....

There are still plenty of people (like me) who enjoy a trip to the bookstore and still buy actual books.  I enjoy browsing through the titles, looking at the cover photos or illustrations.  And even though the price of paperback is up to about ten dollars these days, I still prefer that over something you download on to a "reading device".

The book cover and the title are the two main selling points of any book.  It's what the book publishers hope will make you pick up a copy and take it to the cashier.  Usually they do a very good job of marrying an image to a title.

But not always.

Sometimes, the book titles are horrible.  You can't help but wonder if anyone at the publishing company gave  any real thought to what the books were called.  Here are a few examples (and yes, these are real books)--






Sometimes, there's nothing wrong with the title.  The title is fine.  But the picture used to illustrate the cover?  Someone was not paying close attention.




And sometimes, it's the book title and the book cover that wind up being a horrible, horrible combination.  They are just wrong on so many levels.






That last one is particularly disturbing...... :-)

I take no credit for finding any of these, by the way.  There's a wonderful website called Ramp.ie that recently posted a list of the Top 10 worst book covers and titles.  The "Top 10" list actually has 34 examples in it, by the way.  The books above are some of them.  If you'd like to see all 34, here's the web address (you can copy and paste this into your browser):

http://ramp.ie/index.php/reviews/books/top-ten-horrible-book-covers/

When you're done with the horrible book covers, take some time and explore some of the past posts on their site.  Some of them are bound to make you laugh out loud or, at least, put a smile on your face.  Ramp.ie is an excellent site.  You'll be glad you went there.