The Machine Age

Recently I heard about the latest thing in vending machines: Facial Recognition Software.

This is not the sort of Facial Recognition program that, say, Las Vegas casinos use in trying to pinpoint an individual. It's much more general. Here's how it works:

Let us use as an example a machine that dispenses beverages of all kinds. The machine will do a general scan of the customer and then make a drink recommendation based on what it 'sees'. For example, if it scans an adult male, the machine may recommend a coffee drink, figuring he's in the middle of his work day and may need the pick-me-up. If the scan reveals the customer to be a young adult female, it may recommend a drink that tends to be a bit sweeter. If the customer is just a child, it may recommend juice. And if the customer is an older male or female, it might suggest a healthier drink, like green tea.

People are free to ignore the recommendations, of course. But the suggestions could be helpful during those times when you know you want something, but haven't quite made your mind up as to what it is you want

Naturally, I think this idea could quite easily be converted into something we spankos can use--

"BASED ON MY B.R.S. (BOTTOM RECOGNITION SOFTWARE), I RECOMMEND THE TREATMENT CONTINUE FOR FIVE MORE MINUTES."