Enjoy!
SANTA'S TAWSE IS GOING TO TOWN
Oh, you should have watched out
You know that you should
Now you're bent over
And getting it good
Santa's Tawse is going to town
He checked his list
Your name's on it twice!
Now it's "pants down"
And you're paying the price
Santa's Tawse is going to town
Each girl elf in his workshop
Knows Santa's strong right arm
They know their work had best not stop
Or he'll do their bottoms harm
OW!
You should have watched out
You know that you should
Now you're bent over
And getting it good
Santa's tawse is going to town
There's paddles and canes
In his toy pouch
Whackity-whack
And ouchity-ouch
Santa's tawse is going to town
He's spanking away
Just like he oughtta
He's making you feel
Like your bum's a pinata
Santa's tawse is going to town
You wish that you could just hop
Into your snug, warm bed
But Santa said he won't stop 'til
Your bottom is bright red
OW!
You should have watched out
You know that you should
Now you're bent over
And getting it good
Santa's tawse is going
Your behind is glowing
Santa's tawse is going
To town!
LOL! I will now be able to tolerate that song when it comes on the radio again--in approximately thirty minutes, I would guess.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Hermione
Now that is destined to be a classic!
ReplyDeleteOughta/Pinata? ROTFLMAO!!!! :-) Love it!
ReplyDeleteHey! I was going to give him grief about the oughta/pinata rhyme, Season! Oh well, as long as it's done ... *G*
ReplyDeleteTerrific parody, Doc, and yes, Hermione, these much improved lyrics should make the song easier to tolerate for the next few days.
-Dev
Excellent, Dr. Ken. Like Hermione said, now we can substitute your lyrics when the song rolls around in a few minutes and really enjoy it.
ReplyDeleteMichael
Hey Doc! Another fine song you have written!
ReplyDeleteJust wondering what shape is your pinata??
:)
Hi Doc! VERY nice song and I LOVED it! Now I can sing this in my head instead of the other song! LOL! But the tawse is an evil implement!
ReplyDeleteYes, definitely a Christmas classic with a kinky twist.
ReplyDeletepammie
Hermione--Y'know, ordinarily when I tell a lady that I'll give her something to think about, song lyrics aren't what I have in mind...but I'm glad you enjoyed it!
ReplyDeleteSpanky--yeah, but a classic what? :-)
Season, Devlin--what's wrong with oughta/pinata? Everybody's a critic.....
As I got to writing this up, I discovered that I actually had one verse too many to use in the song. The other verse went:
He's making you kick
Making you squirm
You can't get away
'Cause he's holding you firm
Santa's tawse is going to town
There's nothing wrong with the verse, it's got some nice evocative imagery going for it. Ultimately, I decided I liked the humor of the "pinata" verse, and so I went with it.
Michael--thank you. And you know they'll be playing that song for a while after Christmas, as well, so you'll probably have my version memorized by the time the season ends.
CJ--I don't have a handy pinata. Would you like to volunteer?
Pest--Print out the lyrics and carry them with you so you're always prepared to sing along!
Pammie--that pretty well sums it up! :-)
Hi Dr. Ken:
ReplyDeleteSorry I'm a day late.
But I'm glad I am cause I got to see the verse you left out:
"He's making you kick
Making you squirm
You can't get away
'Cause he's holding you firm
Santa's tawse is going to town"
I like that verse, especially the holding you firm line.
Thanks for sharing
I am sending you some holiday spirit as I write this
Take Care,
Andrades Girl
I like that extra verse too! It's a keeper.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Hermione
Well done Dr Ken, it is always fun to pervert a Christmas classic.
ReplyDeleteHugs and happy Christmas.
Mina
Now I got your song running around in my head. Happy Holidays, Dr. Ken!
ReplyDeleteradha
A very Merry Christmas to you as well, Dr. Ken, hope that you have a wonderful holiday season.
ReplyDeleteDr. Ken, I also like that deleted verse. So where would it go if I do print out the lyrics? You could always email me the entire song even the deleted verse! LOL! Merry Christmas, Dr. Ken and to everyone who reads your blog!
ReplyDeleteAndrades--thanks. I can always use a little extra Christmas spirit. And I'm glad you liked the extra verse.
ReplyDeleteHermione--It's a good verse, but as I said, I've really no place to put. The scheme of the song is "A B B C A B B C A" where A is the repeated stanza (You should have watched out), B B is the two verses, and C is the bridge (the "Each girl elf" and "You wish" part. The extra verse may be a keeper, but there's really no place to keep it.
Mina--I do like to have fun with songs, it's true. Christmas hugs to you, as well.
Radha--you say that like it's a bad thing..... :-)
Richard--thank you, Richard. Great to see you here! And Holly Happydays to you, too.... *G*
Pest--if the extra verse went anywhere, it would go in place of the "pinata" verse.